WRITER'S WRITE...WRITING PARTNERS FEUD

HE ROSE
By: Angelica Hart and Zi

Z: Humor is a powerful lubricant. (He rocked back in his chair, noticed his perfect hair and gave that bon vivant stare)
A: Huh? Are you talking Dew Drops or Adam and Eve Gel? (He had piqued her interest since she was inventorying office supplies and that s#@ked... she thought the word but decorum kept her from saying it out loud)
Z: What? (Stunned slapped the bon vivant right off his face)
A: I know I have read that women value humor and find it very seductive. Men have been known to joke the panties off a woman. I once heard about this lady from Starling...
Z: Ok... ok... hold your horses.
A: I have horses... where am I keeping them... want to ride... are they polo ponies... what? (She feigned that serious that we feign when we are playing another)
Z: You are now chain pulling... aren't you?
A: A tad. (She offered him a high-5 but he declined... so she gave herself one in the reflection of the mirror)
Z: My point that I was trying to make was that humor can smooth the mussed sheets of life.
A: Sheets after vigorous sex... clumped and bunched... but my advice is if you are smoothing by hand, you better watch out for the wet...
Z: ANGELICA...don't go there. You know everyone likes a little arse no one likes a wise arse.
A: Consider me aptly disciplined, you spanked well. (She smiled) Tell me a joke... lube me! (She had that snide look of someone teasing)
Z: What did one writing partner say to the other?
A: What?
Z: (There was utter silence as Zi left the room)
A: What? (She chased after him) What! Ok... ok... I'm sorry!
Z: (Zi muttered under his breath... joke'em if they can't take a @#$%)

What a wonderful dance artful writing can be when dealing with social issues. Yes, some are very serious and in no way do we take them tritely, but as my Grams always told me, "You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar." So occasionally, we'll take a serious social issue and frost it with inane situations punctuated by laughter. The following is an example:

Life had been difficult for Joyce. Her boss, Duwayne, whether it was ill-intended or not, was making passes at her at the workplace. She needed the job and tolerated his behavior.

He was far more the spoiled mama's boy, she giving him the job, but nonetheless this portly nebbish persisted through innuendo and sometimes overt bluntness to pursue Joyce.

"Joyce, can you come to my office," was the message from Duwayne.

"Be right there." She noticed that glint in his voice, and if it were any other place or time she'd find it charming, but her mother always said, "Never take your little kitten to work." She knew what mom meant.

Joyce, knocked, opened the door, and entered the room. There sat Duwayne, stark naked, some of his muffin roll hanging and yes, he was beaming with a grand grin.

She wanted to burst into laughter but resisted, and with controlled contriteness she stated, "Mr. Williams I don't know if you know... but your fly is down. Might want to close the barn door before the horse gets loose." She nodded, turned to leave. He rose. Now, for all of you naughty beyond reasonable, no, not in that way, but from his chair.

She turned back, having taken her phone from her pocket, snapped a photo and posted it for all to see.

Mother Williams did more than scold her spoiled son. He eventually apologized to Joyce.

Today, Joyce has Duwayne's job, her gumption impressed the elder Williams.

And what about Duwayne? He is a stay at home father of three. He and Joyce married.


Absolutely, sexual harassment is heinous and horrible. But we like it when someone slips on that pile of dog shat, falls on their arse, gets smudgy with it, screams, whines, and doesn't get hurt. The lesson, let the damn dog out. Oops, the dog is at the door. Got to run or she'll deposit.

A: Zi? (She trying to look cute)
Z: What?
A: Was Joyce talking about my horse?
Z: (The man rolled his eyes and went out and watched his dog deposit)

Angelica Hart and Zi
KILLER DOLLS
SNAKE DANCE
CHASING YESTERDAY
angelicahartandzi@yahoo.com
angelicahartandzi.com

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